Facing the dark side

Within the chrysalis a complete transformation of the caterpillar happens. The cells change and break down creating a completely new form from what entered into this sacred space. No cell unturned. No thought left untouched. The space within this chrysalis is tight and to break free the butterfly must push and struggle to be freed, to survive. This struggle is also what gives it life. The struggle pushes blood to the wings and gets the new form moving preparing for its new life. Contained within this new form all the information and knowledge of what to do as a new creature capable of flight and reproduction. Capable of something it has never seen nor done in its former life as a crawling vegetation eating caterpillar.

My butterflies are now free living their 21 days of life in the sunshine and warmth. Their transformation and subsequent struggle to live played out in my living room under the excited watchful eyes of my little girls and myself. I was spellbound by this process and learned so much about life in those short moments of time. Inside my chrysalis I'm learning things about myself also. As I'm turned inside out I allow the Divine Grace to have its way with me and truly help me grow and improve through experience and time.

I have been making piece with my dark side. I never truly understood what that meant until this week. Its the unhappy thoughts, fears, and scars that are ignored and shoved deep into the depths of the mind. I'm freeing myself from these things slowly and with purpose so they can be brought to the light and released to become my strength and my knowledge of how to learn and grow forward. I'm feeling the push and pull of my transformation and the walls are growing tighter as I expand.

I'm also coming to terms with the biggest fear that has held me back my whole life. I'm not sure of its roots- perhaps a past life- as I cannot remember a life experience where I wasn't held back because of this fear. I fear accomplishment. I actually have managed to always keep myself in my safe bubble where I am rarely surrounded by anything that can fail or cause my failure. Its not to say I don't take chances I just don't take big ones. My daughters are the exception and they were the spark that started me down the deepest depths of self improvement. Last week I realized my greatest fear and it made me cry. How was I ever to inspire and support my greatest creation if I couldn't do the same for myself? It has been a week since I realized this deep fear and as it spun inside my being tearing me up and cutting me raw I slowly faced it and grew stronger in knowing its name. I placed it into the Sacred Light and asked for its healing. This process is a daily ritual and I have to know it with every breath. It has become my friend and in honoring this fear it is slowly melting into my strength to push me forward.

I have created an opening for so much growth by accepting my darkest space within me and in doing so I am slowly remember who I truly was always born to be in this lifetime. I wish the same for each of you as you read these words because I believe we all are capable of remembering who we are and what we are here to do. Societally influencing is slowing melting away in my world because I give it no power when my soul guides and I do what always feels right to my very core. Imagine what our world would look like if we all did our best and followed Divine Guidance.

It wasn't easy to share this deep healing but it feels good to know its written and shared to help others. I honor each of you as you travel your roads of life.

In Loving Support ~ Leah

Chrysalis

I started this blog over a year ago after a very powerful encounter with the moon, Jupiter, my higher self and the Divine Will. It all flowed together and was so obvious as to what I was to do to support myself and others on this great path of awakening that we are undergoing here on Earth. Over the year each observance was highlighted with a different level of awakening. Each chakra what cleansed and healed or broke open to be freed from its bonds and attachments. Each step of the way I grew and we grew together. My heart knew that the Love that flowed through me entered deep into my words and these pages. On the Capricorn new year my visions of this blog seemed to blur. I had delivered my first stage of information and now I had little to add but posts of the beauty of fully awakening and understanding what it meant to be a Divine Being. I was seeing the world completely different now that I had experienced my guided awakening. I wondered where the road would take me. So I meditated and waited. 

I started absorbing information again. Sleeping a lot and feeling my body shift. The sacred wheel had kept turning. My direction seems to be on a long golden road filled with love but little landscape to speak of and few words to share. Until now....

On Monday I brought home four painted lady caterpillars to be observed by my two beautiful four year old girls and myself. I have been more fascinated by them then my girls have been because they are symbolic of me. I felt my kinship to them the moment they were handed to me. I have always had Butterfly as a personal totem. I choose it or it choose me when I was about 10- at least that's my first memory of our kinship. I never let go of this cycle- Metamorphosis- my whole life it has been how I have evolved. Birth, consume, death, rebirth and create. This process has never been so clear as this moment on the cusp of a new moon with 4 pupa (chrysalis) hanging in my butterfly house silently undergoing the biggest transformation without anything visibly happening on the outside. The actual creation of the pupa itself happens so slowly and gracefully I had to stand there for the better part of a half hour to even notice it was happening. This is where I find myself. I have been slowly creating my pupa. I am entering into my chrysalis to undergo the biggest transformation my life has yet to see. I'm ready and as always open to all the gifts the beautiful universe has to offer me. 

I know little of where this process will take me however I do know one thing. I am guided with all my heart to share my thoughts and experiences of this process with others so they too can notice the small shifts and possibly see the bigger change that is happening within and around them. Please stay tuned as I share my process and eventually my breaking open of my new self. 

Wishing you Divine Blessings on the cusp of this New Moon ripe with endless possibilities and full of Deep Sacred Love.

Soul Talk

Enter into the Light

Feel the presence of the Divine, your divine soul and being that fills the empty spaces. Allow yourself to open up like a flower to the senses of a thousand million flutters of light surrounding you and entering into you as you awaken to your Divinity. This is the awakening of your soul. The knowledge that you truly are Divine and that all you ever had to do was believe in it with all your heart. To know from the moment that you were born that this promise was contained within you.

Children hold this promise and know this truth is their own. Walking the path with them may give you a glimpse of their magnificence and it may also shine light into your memories of how you once felt as a child. Remembering how you always believed in everything you did was real and all was possible. It truely is this way - that everything is possible and if we start to live with this state of mind again the world just unfolds before us and doors open that once were locked or hidden from view. Our children, the children around us, they all know this instinctually and we hold the key to keeping them open to this as they hold the key to unlocking our bariers of illusion that society put in place to limit our beliefs in self.

Everyone is born a leader and regardless of how you feel you have this inside you too.

You lead the moment you become a parent or foster an animal. You lead when you assist others in need.  Its not the size of the leading thats taking place its the fact that you recognize your ability to lead.

Everyone is born to make choices and with free will follow their hearts desires. This light inside may grow dim due to lifestyle and circumstances but if theres a will theres a way. Great people rise from the ashes and every day folk walk around as living angels. The spark is within you, all you have to do is feed the fire.

Feeding the Fire

Start in this moment by quieting your self and just breathing into the silence of the moment. You can't hear your heart and soul speak if you don't stop the chatter, the endless emails and phone calls, turn the TV and other personal entertainment devices off and just be.

Just Be. Honor your self and listen. If you can only do it for a few moments that ok because your starting and thats better than never giving yourself another chance. When you were little all you did was listen to self before social programing started. Now give yourself this opportuinity to shine in your own light and be a star on earth. Once you've made it through the first quiet moments with yourself then focus on growing that time that you spend alone. It doesn't have to be long it just has to be. Moments of honored time to self. Before the family wakes in the morning, after the kids go to bed, a hot bath, locked in your car before you walk into your house and the chaos of life takes over. Just find those moments and let them grow. You will find you love them and you'll want more and you'll make more time and you find more resources to make more time. It will become important to you. As this honored time expands then all the knowledge of a thousand lifetimes will slowly seep back into your awareness. Your dreams will shift. Your choices will change and your ego wont be running the show any more. You might make diet changes or new friendships. You might stop drinking soda or alcohol and you might also end relationships that just dont seem to fit you anymore. Lots of changes happen when you get into your flow. Its all as it should be because your following your heart and floating free on the wings of your soul.

Be like a butterfly and take flight. Your wings are dry and its time to catch the wind. Soar! Soar High and reach for the stars! Awaken with your growing beautiful soul. 

Crystalized Expression

Seven door ways to the soul. This is how our chakras have opened us up to the life of soul living. An ever present Divine knowledge that resides within each breath as we move forward, upward and beyond fully awakened into our souls light.

The Autumnal Equinox brought us the awakening of the Brow chakra or Third Eye and with it an ever awakening awareness of something far greater than ourselves. This knowing that slowly showed itself was the Divine Blueprint of the soul being shown through action, vision, and feeling within the heart. This time also marked the connection to the higher realms of Divinity of the Grace of Spirit. Divine Truth and Purity of Light opened with us knowledge of how best to move forward on the path that was created for us at this sacred time. Lots of cleansing also took place as the ego was finally challenged to join forces with the Soul and walk the line that supports the will of Spirit for the greater good of all.

Once we crossed the passage of Samhain, the cross-quarter assoicated with Halloween, All Saints Day or the Day of the Dead we reached our final stage of awakening to the traditional seven chakras- our Crown Chakra. Words are hard to find to explain the connection that flows through the body when the crown is fully opened. Light is usually assoicated with the opening of the crown as the connection with the anthakarna opens fully. The energy that flows at this level will at times feel like a tingle or warmth bathing over the body through the chakra systems. Spiritually this is the start and end of the cycle. As our soul design is fully awakened it also flows around the auraic body and back down to the feet and root chakras to begin again.

The universe now provides us with an extraordinary event to fully open to what we have witnessed within and around ourselves. The solar year ends with an eclipse series that provides another opportunity for the soul to receive. These powerful portals of Life are the New Moon Solar Eclipse on November 25th and the Full Moon Lunar Eclipse on December 10th. Divine codes that are contained within our bodies and surrounding us from Mother Earth will light like fireflies and enter into our awareness. With focus and care we can manifest our true potential for growth and expansion at this time by allowing our hearts and minds to open to the Divine Will and Love of Spirit. This is about fully aligning with what your Divine purpose is and how to best play a role in the awakening of a greater community of humanity on Earth. This is about fully understanding what all the great prophets meant when they said a Love greater than Self. Imagine seeing the Love of Spirit in everything you see, touch and hear. Opening up to the beauty of life- one breath at a time.

You hold the potential to all this and so much more if you hold yourself into the Love and honor that all you ever needed was already contained with you. You are the magic key to the unfolding of Universal Love. Take your life into your hands and awaken to the Love of your Heart.

Hearts Spoken Truth

When the heart speaks the throat chakra awakens to speak the hearts truth.

Truth holds power that other words cannot- the hearts truth is always strongest. The freedom found in the vibrations of each syllable is like butterfly wings floating on the breath of the soul. Lifting up to the Divine Source, the truth is made Golden in the Light and heard by the endless ears of the Universe. Suns bend and planets yield to bring this truth to pass. Your truth has now become a co-creator of all that is- one with the Divine Source again. The first words spoken in truth may flow like a raging river or may choke you up as you gather all your strength to speak them free. Once the flow is open your hearts whispers will grow to strong intention that can no longer be denied. Form turns into function. You are now awakening into the truth of the soul.

Unity with Purpose
Lack of strong family of origin connection has left me to find my true roots in self within the Divine connection to Mother Earth and to the Divine Source. No greater gift could be given; no more painful truth could be spoken. We are all one. Old beliefs of strong family ties are wiped away so the foundations of the soul can be formed and created in the Light of the Divine. Holding true to the hearts desires above all third dimensional yearning is key to continue to awaken and fully embody the truth of your essence. Release what you thought was the truth of your birth patterns given to you through your blood line and find what your truth is within as well as above you. The ties of family of origin karma are no longer required of any soul that wishes to be released and relieved of its obligations. This shift is not without a loss but the gain is the connection to your Divine Self and the Divine Source which are one.

Reflection
There is a swirl of energy surrounding us now that is reflecting all that we are as well as giving us the chance to see what is possible within us. Quiet the self within and witness what is possible. The truth is endless in its possibility. The only step that must be taken is to accept that you have no boundaries contained within you. You are as limitless as the Light that shines within your soul and connects you to all that is and will ever be.

Blessing of Understanding and Love!

Heart Bursting Forth

Awakening the heart charka and feeling into the breath of the soul takes courage. You must be willing to reach within and feel the pain of lifetimes as well as the Grace of a thousand Loves that fill your being.

Stop and listen to your heart beat. Its physical function is clear and it does it without thought or effort. When you continue to listen and center you suddenly witness a much deeper feeling here. This is the home of your soul, the birth place of the life of Love. Radiating here is the clear liquid gold of breath, life, love. Circling outward, upward, inward and all spaces in between you can feel this throughout your being if you become quiet and aware.

Awareness of this sacred space allows for the insight of the blocks and pain that may also reside here from group conscious programming, personal experience, and lifetimes of karmic energy stored. This is also where the empathy of your being is felt and takes place. When you sense hurt there for no reason your connecting to something you have attached yourself to through your charka. This is your empathic connection and understanding how it works will assist in clearing old cords or connection points that may have been created long ago and that are no longer needed. Clearing this space of unwanted or unneeded energy will assist in the expanse of the Divine Love that has been created to flow through you. Clearing is as simple as projecting healing light into the open charka and saying words or prayer of release. Clearing can also be a ritual of great care that involves a night of meditation, acknowledgement of each block or cord being removed and a love filled bath of light prior to the rituals end. The point is to be free of what holds you back and weights your heart center down.

Now is the time to truly feel the Love of the Divine and move into the divinity of your souls truth. Whispers of hidden knowledge will become heard and seen through this delicate space your soul occupies. You will grow bold in your willingness to feel compassion and honor all souls on this journey. You will reach out with an open heart and touch the stars with you gift of you. Nothing can be more compassionate than the act of self love to be shared with the universe one breath at a time.

Your time is now. Your life is now. Open, breathe, be free. Enter into the Light of a Lifetime.

The Seed Burst Forth

The Seed has burst forth. 
The first rays of light shine down on the little seedling 
Gifting promise and life~ endless as the breeze.
Rooted with the earth 
Surrounded by the air 
Reaching for the stars 
This was the awakening that was promised. 
Today growth is one of strength and understanding of what is contained within the stems of life.
The leaves of nature move up and out reaching and expanding in Love.



My Personal Story


The process of growing from seed to seedling is complete. The awakening of my soul to a higher level started with a burst of light that literally cracked open at the base of my spine- the root chakra- and shot up through the central meridian for just a few quick seconds. Awakening in the physical can be painful and this moment was no exception. The soul awoke in the physical body and left me in pieces for days. The pain was strong. It was hot then ice cold. I could feel the ripples of this light slowly moving from the central point out into my legs, torso, and then arms and head. I used Reiki to heal the initial pain and shock. Then healthy doses of prayer and requests for Divine Grace for the integration. I quickly sought Alternative forms of Medicine to assist with the realignment of my back and pelvis. More came out of these visits which has healed me even deep in new areas that also needed assistance and healing. My first kundalini initiation was complete.

I was a new small seedling, I was vulnerable and delicate. I needed lots of water and fresh food. Lacking sunlight here in the Pacific Northwest I sought out foods to stimulate me in the ways my body was craving. I grew a stronger connection with my body as my soul filled itself in spaces it had never occupied before. As the physical body issues started to reach the new level of wholeness my body prepare for the next step upward.

I cleansed and detoxed the natural way my body requested and then received the next upgrade needed. I went through a molecular upgrade. At the core of every atom in my body I released the old patterns of eons of lifetimes. Lower vibrational energies that no longer could hold space in a body coming into its new form. This process appears on the outside to be an illness. A cold with a mind of its own. Initially my body told me 72 hours of release. I drank lots of water and stayed focus on the outcome and ignored the physical pain that was burning through me. This process was like the initial wave of light I felt at the awakening. The difference was it burned slowly at each phase of release. It would sit in different spots within and then move like a wave to another space that needed focus. I ran fevers, had chills, and felt exhausted while releasing all I could with all my heart. While sleeping on the 3rd night  I was feeling the lift of energy change within and I made a conscious choice to try and clear the block that has been lodged in my throat chakra my whole life. This healing process was more centralized in the throat and heart chakra areas affecting me physically in my throat and lungs. This release was different and more difficult as I was working on a deep seated karmic energy that wasn't willing to leave quietly. Four days later the pain lifted however I still choke up and feel the energy still attempting to hold on while the cellular level of my body try to dislodge and release. I will continue to work on my healing of this area.

The last of the healing within has been less resistant to change and more flowing of the light- these are the dreams and memories of all my lifetimes contained within. They come to me in the dream state most often although they have also been released in visions and strange memories that are triggered by outside experience in my daily life.

The connection and awakening of the third chakra has grown into a new awareness of food and digestion. I am not able to eat anything that my body doesn't want or crave. This meaning- my brain may want that yummy looking cupcake my daughters are having but my body does not. The disconnect- my programmed ego brain and my digestive system- is a  much needed change. It helps to guide me to what my nutritional needs may be at that moment. Needs that may change as my body continues to shift and grow.



The Flowering


The awakening of a soul in this new paradigm is not always for the faint of heart. It requires Faith and lot of Love for self and the process. I find myself in a new body that seems lighter (I haven't actually lost a pound) and more centered in the knowing. The next steps forward still remain in front of me hiding behind a fog of light. My focus still remains on clearing up any remaining loose ends that still need to be lifted up and out. This is the time for growing strong and understanding what it is that I am awakened to do in this cycle and all the cycles to follow.



We are the Divine Light. We are the Universe. We are LOVE.